Attractions !!

Very easy to get attracted and very difficult to avoid it!!!

Well, off late I have been attracting all the wrong people in the world. While I feel great that people drop in compliments etc…it kind of gets disgusting to avoid them. I have been running away from men who are not supposed to behave in a certain way. Ethically not correct! What is the justification to a 45 year old getting charged up seeing a 20 something… please men not everybody is a Kabir Bedi or a Salman Rushdie. You have children, you have a perfect wife - stay happy!!!

But then again I might be very prudish to think so. I recently happened to catch “The Graduate”. For those who have not seen it, see it. I actually didn’t like the movie that much even five years ago. But Boredom made me go back to it. The whole concept of an older woman attracting a younger man was initially absurd. But then Attraction is something you can’t justified. I get attracted to a good conversationalist. I get attracted to men who would be rakish in their behavior. I cannot justify that. So while a Rake will attract me towards him, an investment banker who my mom chose for me to marry will repel me like crazy.

So anyway, my point is since you can’t justify the emotion, please go ahead and let people know that you are attracted to them. Also please distinguish the feelings. Its attraction not love. Its temporary and not permanent. Please don’t pursue as if it were the end of the world. You will be attracted to something or someone again and its perfectly fine. Do not justify it. Do not mess it up by doing that.

While this might be a volatile article…my point is let’s be mature and understand attraction and not mess it up! Love is something more insane than this. Let’s stay away from that!!


All the best...:)

Confessions!

I quote from my favorite play (Look Back in Anger):

"It's no good fooling about with love you know. You can't fall into it like a soft job without dirtying up your hands. It takes muscle and guts. If you can't bear the thought of messing up your nice, tidy soul, you better give up the whole idea of life and become a saint, because you'll never make it as a human being. It's either this world... or the next."

I love this part as it tells you how you need to be brave and have the balls to go ahead and experience the opposite sex. It’s all about branding at the end of the day. Let’s put it like this…I see what you show me and Vice versa. There has to be something to keep me going. I need the rush all the time. Just like you expect me to be sexy and hot, I expect you to show some brilliance. Yes that is exactly what attracts me. The intelligence to keep up to the energy in me. The intelligence to have a stimulating conversation.
For example the above quote is spoken by an extremely sexy character and mind you here…sexy is not about looks it’s about the brains. I love jimmy poter and his kinds. I loved Howard Roark. I loved Darcy. I love that.
I love the fact that these men had passions. Passions going beyond between their legs. So for me it has to be a crazy enough proposition to fall in love. To be able to give in everything. To be able to not think after a while. To be so bloody passionate that it’s fierce. Love does mess up the soul. It does wonders and disasters!
I really don’t know if I am right. At least I feel right!!! That’s an honest confession and also a peek- a -boo into my head!!

Inspirations!

I don’t know if this has ever happened to you, but the smallest of the things take you into a dream world. It makes you drag yourself to a pen and paper or chases you till the nearest computer to start writing your heart.
It happens to me a lot and its the most amazing feeling. One of the reasons I could never be a writer by profession I guess. I cannot be asked to write. I cannot be forced to think. I need my space and my inspiration.
Walking down a dilapidated street in old Mumbai, you would hold your nose for the stink is unbearable. But thankfully eyes are open and so is the brain. The chipping of the wall paint, the rusty iron stairs, the almost broken balcony and the old man without teeth. All are a major source of inspiration. Also is the swanky Bandra home, the couple sitting on Marine drive kissing, the cloudy sky from my office window and the pan -wala who is so oblivious of the world around. Inspiration is also a broken relationship, a memory of that first coffee and that movie ticket that suddenly appears while spring cleaning. I love to observe. To absorb and to reflect!
Everyday mundane activities become so much fun. I really don’t know if this is romanticism or is it my perspective of the reality. All I know is that the way I look at the world makes me live it better!
And I quote the most romantic poet I have read: William Blake :

“To see a world in a grain of sand,
And a heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour.”

Speed Post

Dear Darling Dadu,

How are you? Hope all is well up there! I remember writing to you as a child. I remember how you collected all my letters through the years and kept them all safe. It was fun to read them when I would visit you in the summer vacations.

Yes we did share an awesome relation. I still remember how you spoiled me as I was the first grand -daughter. I remember those red shoes I wanted and you travelled all the way to Bata at CP to get them. That was the best surprise that anyone has ever given me.

You know what life has been good here and I am sure you are happy where you are. As you might already know I finally love what I am working on and I love the city… you know its strange that I have very little to talk to you about. I feel always around to just see what I am doing.

Just miss you sometimes. I still crave for the Shank shondesh, the kacha golla and the ek takar samosa. Yes you were my friend to sneak all the bad food. I miss just giving you a tight hug. I miss the sweaty kiss you wanted to give when you came back from the clinic, I miss the look of those patients who looked up at you when you saved lives, I miss your passion to do things, I miss the abuses you showered on people, I miss our conversations, I miss the arguments, I miss laughing with you, I miss shouting out to you, I miss the excitement in your eyes to see me once I came back from college, I miss how we justified the Chinese, I miss the smell of cigar, I miss the sound of your slippers, I miss the way you woke me up to make tea, I miss the winks we shared when we ganged up…. Yes darling I miss you! No one ever will know and no one ever can the way I do!

Hey I am getting emotional, and I don’t think I should be. Love you a lot. And please take care!

Have fun…cheers to you!!!

Absconding

You must be wondering why I have not been blogging! Well no it’s not a guy, neither is it a girl: P

Well have been superbly busy with work. Have had really long nights at work and absolutely no time to write. And there is just so much to write! Which is a good thing for me and a bad one for you all!!

For starters, am proud to say that my film will finally be on air very soon. It’s amazing to see a script transform on the television! So basically I have been struggling on a lot of work with that. But feels good to finally see the final product.

Its been an amazing week in fact. I booked myself a laptop. I watched a play, produced by theatrician ( a theatre group I was part of in college…will talk later about it). I saw an amazing movie – wake up sid! Awesome stuff…loved the movie…caught up with old friends and above all relaxed. This weekend too is going to be jam packed. I have an old friend flying in from Seattle and of course a long lost friend from Kolkata. We have planned a full itenary of what the three days will see us doing. We have just so much to re live!

Sometimes life seems like flying past you. Sometimes it just stands still. I love the flying past one. I love to be on the move. You know stagnation is a scary thing.

Oh by the way I am reading this book – Family Matters by Rohinton Mistry! Its amazing. Really cathartic you know. I have not even completed 20 % of the book and have shed tears! The old man reminds me of my grand father. The suffering is so painful. The book is however well researched. The guy really knows how to get that little emotion out of me. Something that I had left behind somewhere.

To give myself a break therefore I read Almost Single and My friend Sancho back to back! They are really refreshing and an awesome read. I just could not keep down the book. Loved this one part from My friend Sancho and I quote:

” In the red corner, heart. In the blue corner, brain. The bell rings. Brain steps out and waves about in a cerebral manner, foot work assured technique impeccable. Heart saunters out, belches and swings wildly. A few seconds later, brain is on the floor trying to breathe. Heart like a WWF wrestler, climbs onto the ropes at the side of the ring and dives onto brain, elbow first. Brain goes into coma. Heart raises arms, triumphant over an empty that never had a chance in the first place.”

I loved this bit because somewhere it is how I would be in a situation. I cannot think through my brain. If I need to make a decision it has to be through my heart. I would be so much happier to learn from my mistakes than make a decision through my brain!

Ok I guess this particular went really long….had to share so much I guess….was a bit random though…promise to write more soon….!!!