Tuesday, February 19, 2008

To Give....

Well life is difficult when you fall in love!!

Yeah I know it’s a very different way of looking at things but trust me I am totally in love but at the same time have learnt how life takes its twists and turns.

As an avid reader love stories in books always seemed a distant experience till the summer of 2007. This was also the time when I had decided that I had to make something of my life. Something worthwhile. Had taken up a job in an advertising agency and loved it. Life was looking good when I met Rohit, not that it has stopped looking good but yeah I know how to make things look good.

Well this literary piece is not for my boyfriend and certainly not a love piece. It’s about life and how we just have so much to absorb from it. It’s been almost a year now and I still struggle to understand the emotions that my boyfriend goes through. He is presently in a b-school and his placement season is on. For me this is a very new season to experience. There is lot of tension lot of frustration and a lot of work. So basically it means that I almost have to be the omniscient girlfriend who should be there when you need her but she should be in your way. She should love you, enjoy your moments of glory and abuse the companies that didn’t take you. I know and I trust that he will be placed but I still need to participate in his anticipation of a job. Its huge it’s so big right now that he talks walks and eats his placements. Initially I was irritated and it took me a lot of time to get to terms with this fact. I had after all fallen for an ambitious guy. I had fallen for someone who had it in him to make it big. And today I had to be his support system. I had be the catalyst that would help him go on forever in his journey. I knew that there would be times when he would have no time to listen to my cribbing sessions. But yeah I always knew that.

That past one week has taught me to look at the bigger picture. To look at the fact that this guy speaks to only me when he gets time. He discusses not only his happiness but also his fears, he is someone who thinks am the best thing for him in his life. He is someone ho makes me laugh even when he has had a bad day at the placements. He tries so hard to keep up with my tantrums. At the end of it I have learnt that his ambitions are not only his. I am proud to be with him

And if I had promised some roses then I guess the thorns were always part of it.

Why do women expect so much? I am being an anti- feminist when I say that I will support him. I am there for him because he has and will be there for me when I go through similar moments of tension.

I don’t know why but am happy that I am experiencing these small doses of tensions. Makes us equipped to withstand the harsh times we are going to see. Also it makes me learn to grow up. It teaches me to take small steps at a time and to live in reality.

Relationships need a lot of commitment and only if you are game for that, should one get into it. They have the capability to make a good human being. Also one should not get lost in between things. A relationship doesn’t mean that we give everything into it. It means we retain ourselves and give our best into it!

Am still learning…..