That thing called Patriotism

I am sitting in my office feeling super kicked about the fact that it’s a long weekend. It’s a feeling we all share and next year my father will feel it too as he retires this year and so this one is special!

Ever since my birth I have seen him get ready early in the morning on 15^th August, wear a crisp uniform, try to see if all that brass shines and that shoe shows his face because of the sparkle. All this to pull that string at a government school and hoist that tricolor while the kids wait for a laddoo or a samosa or sometimes both.  I too was once part of those kids. We were so excited to sing and hear these officers/ soldiers talk about India and feel so proud that we were Indian. More so because that was one day we were made to eat laddoos and go back home for the rest of the day. What a feeling.

Is that feeling comparable to the feeling when I walked in today to a small plastic flag that was stuck on my desk? Maybe not. Are we more “Indian” today. Maybe not. Will I, as a civilian ever feel or make people feel how it really feels to be an Indian. Maybe not.

15^th August 1947. Well that means a lot to me and my family and a whole lot of my friends who belong to the forces. We are a family of Air Force and Army brave hearts, who have believed that they were made to serve the country.

To my family it’s not a day of holiday. It’s a day of remembering how it is cool to be in the forces. Being part of the forces - Yes it’s about a lot of parties and endless drinking and yes we love Old Monk and we enjoy a good Tandoori Chicken and oh yes we have seen our parent party long before we knew the meaning of party. But we have also seen our mothers pray to God every time our Fathers went out on a tour or seen that pride in our mom’s eyes every time our dads put on that uniform. We have heard stories of independence from our grandmothers and a whole lot of repeated war stories from my grandfather and I know for sure that my kids will hear more from their grandfather.

Today when I saw this (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zs0cfIic0t0&feature=share), I had to share and put it up on my blog. This Independence Day, I only hope we fall more and more in love with our country. 

So in love that we do not hear a single complain against it, so in love that no one dares to harm it – not even the politicians, so in love that we learn to respect our women and men, so in love that our kids grow up proud of the country that they live in, so in love that we do not compare ourselves to any other country and feel sad, so in love that if it’s taken away from us we will be heartbroken and shattered.  Because it’s just so easy to love India. Try it. 

Begin Again

When we got the tickets to the late night show on a Wednesday, we were expecting entertainment and hoping against hopes that it should not be yet another love story. The trailer said it’s not a love story.

I never write about a movie. I think I am not the right person to sit and critically analyze a movie as I watch movies purely for fun sake. But this one is just out of the world. It connects and this is therefore not a movie review, it’s just about how I felt and would so want you all to go watch it.

The movie starts with two people totally lost on life and with nothing to look forward to. The only one thing that connects them is music. And how can one not fall in love instantly with music. I go back to music all the time. It is my mood – lifter (if that’s a word). I have music for every occasion – wake up music, Sunday morning music, Sunday evening music, Friday music, running music, feeling home- sick music, cooking music, thinking of college days music, feeling awesome music, drive music,… yeah you get the drift. I remember there was a song playing in my head when the priest was reading the wedding promises! I have a song for every moment basically.

So the movie is like that. It’s about how you pick up from where you left, it is about the moment you realize that nothing is permanent and nothing can break you till you want it to break you. You just need to sing a song and be calm. The story is so encouraging. It’s devoured off all the cliché’s. You expect them to kiss and make up and become a couple; you want them to because your mind is tuned to that. But they just follow their heart and make their dreams come through… they also survive. The music touches you and you want to listen to it on a loop.

Please go and watch it if you still have not. 

What is a modern marriage?

Life does not change after marriage. Period.

It’s a little annoying to keep replying to the same set of questions post marriage – has your life changed? Have you become more responsibly? Does life revolve around your husband? Do you cook? Oh! You are working and are married?!!

Well, I got married. Didn’t develop a disease for sure.

Recently stumbled upon this very cute advertisement on TV from Airtel where the wife is a boss and a wife who cooks.

On one hand I loved the ad. Loved that they were showing changing stereotype. Loved the fact that the husband was ok to have his wife as his boss. But are we looking at a change as an audience?

 As a woman it felt good to see her in that position and bad because - why does she need to cook to show her love as a wife? Couldn’t she help him with his presentation for instance? I do that often.

So on the surface it looks like things are changing but right there in the middle of the ad she needs to shift gear and get into the kitchen to cook.  Don’t get me wrong, I love cooking and I cook a lot but not to show that am a loving wife.

Modern women show love in so many different ways. I park my husband’s car often when he is in a hurry or the other day I dropped him off in his car to boys night out as I didn’t want him to drink and drive. I think that is more modern, more the changing trend. I see my friends whose husbands love to cook a meal for them while they are at work. A modern couple go in for adoption for instance, or go for baking classes together, or even run a marathon together. A modern husband lets his wife travel alone and be what she wants to do.  

While the attempt is superb and brave for a brand to show what they show, it is also a responsibility to show something that is actually changing trends. As advertisers we don’t realize that we do have influence on mindsets.

Ad in question:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9BlI9nhqTE 

Kitchen Management

Yes that is what I call it! When I entered the kitchen about 8 months back, I had no clue what was going to be in store….actually NOTHING! My husband had a carton that said “Kitchen stuff” written on bold. When I opened it I found some interesting stuff in it. A nice aluminum wok which most Bengalis will vouch for, a few plastic containers with some contents in them which looked very weird so I threw all of it, a nice big soup mug, a coffee mug, a few plates, spoons and few other basic things. So when I took everything out and looked up at my husband looking at me , he knew that his weekend was gone. So today after 8 months I feel that this post will help a lot of people to organize their kitchens ( both married and unmarried) and also because I had to make a number of phone calls to my mother to figure the basic out. So here is a plan that I hope helps you.

Start with the basics - utensils. Go slow on the purchase as most of the things available in malls / hyper marts are expensive. Don’t try the fancy things. Go for the basics. 

Pic Courtesy : Pinterest 

1. Wok ( buy one normal and one non- stick)

2.       Pan ( for your quick Maggie, eggs etc)

3.       3 Sizes of milk pans ( pateela in Hindi) – 1 litre, 3 litre/4 litre and a bigger one

4.       Tawa for rotis ( if you make parathas and dosas then buy a nonstick version

5.       Chakla belan ( for rolling the rotis)

6.       Pressure cooker ( buy one size for now for dal etc) – 2 litres is good enough

7.       Some wooden spatulas and spoons.

8.       Buy a set of spoons, fork and knives.

9.       Chopping board ( a basic one would do )

10.   Tongs for roti and taking the hot utensils off the gas stove

11.   Buy a set of plastic containers that are microwave friendly ( helps you to keep food after the food is made and also you can use it for storage in fridge)

12.   Buy a set of spice containers ( I bought about 20 small bottles and 10 bigger bottles for spice and dal)

13.   Buy two big containers for rice and atta

14.   Buy some wipes as you will need them.

Pic Courtesy : Pintrest 

Once you have the utensils in place, go to a grocery store to pick up all your spices, lentils, rice etc. You will need to think though this so go to a departmental store/ hypermart as they have sections which will help you to figure your life out. I picked up the basic spices and two types of lentils with rice and wheat to begin with.  Ok so there is a little secret I did : I followed my day from waking up to sleeping and made a list of things I will need. Eg : Tea when I wake up, breakfast ( eggs and bread and milk) … so on and so forth. It helps to make a list before hand or else you can get lost

Next stop was at the veg/ non- veg section. Here I picked up the basic flavorings like onion, garlic, ginger and then just got 3 more veggies. I wanted to see if I could be regular with the cooking or not first.

Lastly, I could have missed a lot here, but this is a basic list. You keep adding as you go. I hope this helps you all out there. Enjoy setting up your kitchen as it’s the heart of your house and a well planned kitchen is always a delight for any cook!

The Coriander ( fresh green) Pomfret

This recipe was first made at our place by my mom in law and the thing with moms is that you just can never get that same taste - ever! Recently we happened to have that craving of that recipe again and had no choice but to experiment and boy it did taste good ( not as good as hers but nevertheless). Am going to share it here because it gives many people access to it. Have fun perfecting it! :) 

Ingredients 
( Serves 2 adults who love fish) 

• 2 big sized Pomfret ( Sea water) cut into two halves as its easier to handle them in the pan. 
• Fresh Coriander bunch ( this needs to be large in quantity as it will make the gravy as opposed to a garnish. So buy so much that when you make a paste out of it , its about 1/2 litre ) Make sure its a paste that is thick in consistency so add very little water if the mixer is giving an issue grinding it 
• 1 medium sized onion chopped very finely ( am a bit lazy that way so I keep a paste of onions in my fridge.) 
• 2 green chillies that are hot 
• 5 - 6 big garlic kernels ( again I usually have a paste of Ginger and Garlic paste so I used about 1 tb spoon of that paste) 
• Ginger is optional 
• Mustard Oil 
• Salt & Sugar to taste 
• Turmeric & Red chilli Powder 

Note : Other option is to make a paste of Onion + Garlic + Ginger + Chillies 

The 5 minute method ( The non- bake option) 

Take a pan. Add about 2 teaspoon of Mustard Oil ( I prefer low oil so the less amount..you can add as per your liking). 

Once the oil heats up and you can smell the Mustard oil, Pour the paste of onion , chillies, garlic and ginger. In case you are chopping the Onion then you add the onion first and the rest follows ( adding chillies to the oil will make it more spicy) . I add a little salt at this point to avoid the onion from getting over cooked. Stir for about 30 secs till you can see the onion change colour. Pour the coriander paste ( all of it). 

Once you see its simmer a little add the raw fish ( do not fry it) 

Cover the pan and put the stove on SIM. 

Let the whole mix simmer for about 2 minutes ( Fish cooks fast), and turn the fish carefully as its a delicate fish). Let it simmer a little more. You will see the oil separate from the gravy and the house fill up with coriander smell... that is when you switch it off and let it cool off a little before serving ( helps the fish and gravy to settle) 

Serve with white rice. 

For the Baked/ microwave version 

Coat the pastes on the fish and place in a borosil container with a lid or a plastic film on top with about 2 -3 holes in it. pour a little mustard oil ( about 1 teaspoon) and put it in the microwave for about 2 minutes and then turn the fish and again for 2 minutes. You will need to check on the fish and the gravy. If its not cooked then increase the time accordingly. 

Enjoy the recipe and let me know how it turns out. 

The Crazy Honeymoon ( Roopkund Trek . Uttrakhand. June 2014. 16500ft)

On our way to the Base camp ,Lohajung . 

Tea plantations.  

The route to Lohajung is all full of such scenic roads 

Almost at Lohajung ( a 12 hour drive from Kathgodam) 

The morning we were to leave @ Lohajung 

Our trek was full of such routes 

At Ali Bugyal 

At Ali Bugyal 

The Bedni Base 

The Bedni Base 

The army training for altitudes. They ran while we walked.  

In the morning of the Bedni to Pathar nauchni trek 

We decided to stay back thanks to my stomach and blisters 

The effort of the trek was worth it 

India is a land of people who love to know what is going on in others life more than their own. Wedding is a hot topic and post my wedding I realized that so was Honeymoon. Immediately after we were married we were asked this question not only by our friends but also by the elders in the family. To everyone’s disappointment we skipped the honeymoon part and directly jumped into the new life that awaited us and got caught up totally. Not because we were really a boring couple but we just wanted to make our first vacation (we treated it like a nice long vacation) well planned and also a little different.

So two months later after we had settled into the new way of life, in the month of February we began searching the internet for options and also to figure out our budgets. We thought of the luxury European trip and then we thought of backpacking to some exotic place. Nothing was matching up to what we thought should be a “landmark” holiday! After many fights and many more budget excels we decided to stick to India.

To our surprise, when we started the research on India and places to visit we had a five year plan ahead of us! Then we started to fight on if we should go to the hills or the sea. Yes we had too many fights and too many discussions before we concluded that both of us loved the North of India. We both wanted to visit the Mountains and live in the tranquility of the place.

We both wanted to go for a trek. We had never done a trek in our lives before so we decided to give it a shot. We chose a moderate / difficult trek as our first trek. We were confident that we would be able to pull this off since we had been hitting the gym since a while. However, there was a surprise in store. A few things to keep in mind for the first timers:

a)      Start making a list of the things that the websites say and the things that you gather from talking to friends

b)      Start preparing for the trek at least 3 months in advance and that includes both physical and mental preparations.

c)       For physical fitness the website for our trek said 4 kms run in 30 mins approx. However, what one needs to keep in mind is that this is ( these points will help you for the walk) :

a.       Not on a treadmill

b.      Should be at an elevation which is close to 60 degs

c.       Mentally one should be prepared for the fact that the roads will not be roads that you see in the cities (we had rocks, dried leaves and pebbles).

d.      It will be sunny and really sunny as the sun on the mountains will be strong and direct.

e.      Start training your mind to drink less water while walking as there will be no restrooms on your way. Also your body tends to become heavy as you drink water and that makes it lethargic

f.        Try to have a day pack with you with basic things like energy bars, towels, some juice or glucose mix, cap, sunglasses etc. This is so because in case you are not able to carry your backpack which will be at least 7 – 8 kgs you can give it to the mules and just carry the day pack

After all the preparation, we set off for our 10 day vacation. We reached Kathgodam on the 31^st of May and stayed at a Government guest house near the station. Next day early morning we started our cab ride of 12 hours approximately to Lohajung. This was the base camp. We reached and realized the temperature difference and also how we were so away from all the luxuries of life that included electricity. Even then it was divine. Peaceful and totally cut off from city life.

On 2^nd June at around 7 am we started the trek. Soon after we had started I realized the biggest mistake of my life that would cost a lot of trouble. My shoes had started to bite so badly I could hardly walk. So first timers please wear your shoes for at least a week before the trek and get used to them. Wear two socks to make them open up and also to make you feel comfortable. Trekking shoes are heavy, bulky and can be really uncomfortable. They are meant to be so as you will be walking on really bad roads and pebbles that need proper grip as you cannot afford to skid on the mountains. So please try and get as used to in them as possible as I had a tough time.

The first day was a mix of assents and descents. You will come to know how much you can push your body on this day as this is when you realize what have you go into. I found this day a tough one as I had no clue of what was ahead. I usually get very jittery if I do not know the end. I am impatient so naturally it added to the anxiety as well. Secondly with the bad shoe issue I had started to lag behind and go slow. Which started working on my mind. Although please note that a trek is a very personal thing so your pace should not be dependent on others. Try to keep a positive mind if you lag behind. Tell yourself that what you are doing is totally worth the effort and more than half the people back home won’t even want to try this – so you are setting an example. Keep yourself motivated and most importantly keep calm. Take the occasional breaks and look around. See where you are and what are doing and how beautiful the world is. You will meet fellow trekkers, talk to them. Basically after a point I realized it was all in my mind more than in my legs. I could hardly feel my legs after a point and trust me its all natural. Your body is not used to that kind of stress. You will have breathlessness and you will feel tired. Everyone feels tired. Don’t stress yourself about your fitness levels once you are at the mountains. Everybody is different and behaves differently at that condition. Even the fittest of the people face issues. So chill. I was about 1 hour delayed from the rest of the group. I had given up on my shoes and my bags and started walking in slippers which were more comfortable. But please do not do that. Once I reached Didina I was exhausted.  When my husband saw me he thought I would die any moment. But I did not. After a good afternoon meal at around 3 pm I slept and rested the rest of the day. Everyone in the group was a little concerned with my pace but I was fine.

We decided to start a little early from the rest of the group the next day. This day was a better trek day. There was a very complicated and long climb which took my energy away totally. With blisters on my feet things were not looking good. Though I enjoyed the trek as this day included walking through a mountain full of forests so the sun was not directly hitting me. I picked up my pace and started walking in that pace with a positive mind. The climb was about 5 hours long. And trust me it was very difficult for a first timer. This was the point when I thought that we should have done a simpler trek than this one. After all that 5 hour long climb, finally I reached Ali Bugyal. It was pretty. I would not have believed the place had I not seen it with my eyes. So green. By now we had covered an altitude of approx 3000 ft. Wow that was an achievement. The walk from Ali Bugyal to Bedni is simpler and nicer. I loved this walk the best. Also there was an assurance that the camp site will be soon near. I also could see my husband walk at a distance. He has been the best on this trek. He did far better than I did. I was hoping I could keep up with him throughout the trek but he was quite fast. J

Once I reached Bedni, I relaxed in our tents. This was the first time in my life I was living inside a tent. So far we had been doing home-stay on this trek, from here on we were to stay in tents. The weather started to get bad. There were very bad rains and oh my god the wind felt like we would be blown away with our tents. For a first timer this will be an experience that either you love or you do not. I loved. The restrooms were a make shift thing and it was so so difficult to even pee! The water was so cold that I felt my fingers will come off! We just stayed inside the tents and tried to stay warm. Me and my husband were just too amazed with the conditions. This was a day of achievement of sorts for me as at one point during the trek I had not thought of reaching Bedni. But please try and reach Bedni somehow. Its so totally worth it and its so beautiful. I was so thankful that I had the mental will and guts to carry on and reach this. We were barely a few kilometers away from Trishul. We were at a height of 12000 ft approx. This is where you realize the potential of your body and how you can push it. I respected my body and made a promise to myself to take care of it. It was just a brilliant moment for me.

Because of all my blisters and injuries, we decided to not continue further. This is because from here the trek gets really difficult with walking on snow etc at a higher altitude. Maybe if I had more guts or was a little bit stronger I would have pushed myself to complete the trek. This last leg somehow did not give me the guts. The only thing I regret is that my husband was also not able to do it as he refused to let go off me and carry on. He said we will come back and do it together. And for his sake maybe I will complete the whole thing one day. So we let the rest of the group carry on the next day while we started to descent. We took a call and climbed down the whole thing in one day which people take 2 days to climb down. We wanted to reach the city / town sooner and figure out if we could go and see some more places. So we climbed down the whole 4000 ft at one go and yes that too was difficult as it had no roads. But I am so glad we did it.

Once we reached the base camp we ate at a local restaurant. Has some awesome chicken curry and roti and felt so good to sleep on beds! Even though we did not complete the trek, there was a lot that we learnt and started to appreciate a lot of common things which we otherwise took for granted. It’s a moment for yourself which will be only for you… so try it out.