Speed Post

Dear Darling Dadu,

How are you? Hope all is well up there! I remember writing to you as a child. I remember how you collected all my letters through the years and kept them all safe. It was fun to read them when I would visit you in the summer vacations.

Yes we did share an awesome relation. I still remember how you spoiled me as I was the first grand -daughter. I remember those red shoes I wanted and you travelled all the way to Bata at CP to get them. That was the best surprise that anyone has ever given me.

You know what life has been good here and I am sure you are happy where you are. As you might already know I finally love what I am working on and I love the city… you know its strange that I have very little to talk to you about. I feel always around to just see what I am doing.

Just miss you sometimes. I still crave for the Shank shondesh, the kacha golla and the ek takar samosa. Yes you were my friend to sneak all the bad food. I miss just giving you a tight hug. I miss the sweaty kiss you wanted to give when you came back from the clinic, I miss the look of those patients who looked up at you when you saved lives, I miss your passion to do things, I miss the abuses you showered on people, I miss our conversations, I miss the arguments, I miss laughing with you, I miss shouting out to you, I miss the excitement in your eyes to see me once I came back from college, I miss how we justified the Chinese, I miss the smell of cigar, I miss the sound of your slippers, I miss the way you woke me up to make tea, I miss the winks we shared when we ganged up…. Yes darling I miss you! No one ever will know and no one ever can the way I do!

Hey I am getting emotional, and I don’t think I should be. Love you a lot. And please take care!

Have fun…cheers to you!!!

Absconding

You must be wondering why I have not been blogging! Well no it’s not a guy, neither is it a girl: P

Well have been superbly busy with work. Have had really long nights at work and absolutely no time to write. And there is just so much to write! Which is a good thing for me and a bad one for you all!!

For starters, am proud to say that my film will finally be on air very soon. It’s amazing to see a script transform on the television! So basically I have been struggling on a lot of work with that. But feels good to finally see the final product.

Its been an amazing week in fact. I booked myself a laptop. I watched a play, produced by theatrician ( a theatre group I was part of in college…will talk later about it). I saw an amazing movie – wake up sid! Awesome stuff…loved the movie…caught up with old friends and above all relaxed. This weekend too is going to be jam packed. I have an old friend flying in from Seattle and of course a long lost friend from Kolkata. We have planned a full itenary of what the three days will see us doing. We have just so much to re live!

Sometimes life seems like flying past you. Sometimes it just stands still. I love the flying past one. I love to be on the move. You know stagnation is a scary thing.

Oh by the way I am reading this book – Family Matters by Rohinton Mistry! Its amazing. Really cathartic you know. I have not even completed 20 % of the book and have shed tears! The old man reminds me of my grand father. The suffering is so painful. The book is however well researched. The guy really knows how to get that little emotion out of me. Something that I had left behind somewhere.

To give myself a break therefore I read Almost Single and My friend Sancho back to back! They are really refreshing and an awesome read. I just could not keep down the book. Loved this one part from My friend Sancho and I quote:

” In the red corner, heart. In the blue corner, brain. The bell rings. Brain steps out and waves about in a cerebral manner, foot work assured technique impeccable. Heart saunters out, belches and swings wildly. A few seconds later, brain is on the floor trying to breathe. Heart like a WWF wrestler, climbs onto the ropes at the side of the ring and dives onto brain, elbow first. Brain goes into coma. Heart raises arms, triumphant over an empty that never had a chance in the first place.”

I loved this bit because somewhere it is how I would be in a situation. I cannot think through my brain. If I need to make a decision it has to be through my heart. I would be so much happier to learn from my mistakes than make a decision through my brain!

Ok I guess this particular went really long….had to share so much I guess….was a bit random though…promise to write more soon….!!!

One rainy night

Well yesterday the rain gods showered like crazy on Mumbai and it was just awesome to see the entire sky change its color. So suddenly from the 15^th floor of my office I could see marine drive become dark at 5pm in the evening. It was a beautiful sight. I wish I had my SLR to just click and keep it as a memory. But apart from the beauty of it all, I could see the traffic coming to a stand -still with people panicking etc. from here it was difficult to make out as to what the situation would be down stairs. Then we came to know that there was a difficulty in getting cabs. Trains were running late as well. So naturally the scene was getting bad.

We tried to wrap up things quickly and hurry back home. By the time we got out of office, the cabs were off the roads. After a long wait, finally spotted a cab. The cab driver refused to go. So the coaxing started. And I just had to take that cab as there was nothing else I could see. So I pleaded and reasoned occasionally and then just plain simple begged. In the mean time there were two men who walked up to the same cab and tried to ask him for some other destination. In my head I wanted to slap this guy. How dare he. So I just gave him one of my looks and said “ excuse me, can’t you see that I am already in conversation with him” to which he apologized and said “ Ma’am we both can take the cab”

So there we were taking a cab back home together. Had an awesome conversation on my way back. Exchanged numbers. He left me smiling. Oh he paid too. Invited for lunch etc.

Common on it was a rainy night. We were two strangers. We had to kill time. Made a friend in the bargain!!!

Will you be mine FOREVER!!!

Well it’s big and I don’t know if that even makes sense at this point to me. I don’t know if I am scared of it or if I am still trying to figure that word out. It’s a bit unreal in my world.

So most of my friends are tying the knot and those who are not, know exactly who that “for forever” person is. I really appreciate them but I am clueless about it.

By the way it’s taken me forever to formulate this article. I just don’t seem to get into the flow of finishing this one. Maybe that’s forever. When you don’t want to finish something or the feeling just lingers on. Maybe just maybe my guess is that a person who even if he leave will linger on till ever. That way I have met so many people who have left an impression. People who have touched my life in a certain way. Then they are mine forever. Right?

Maybe not.

Maybe the person for who considers me as forever is actually forever for me. People come and go. People let you come and go but people who make you stay back and stay forever are actually the people you should not let go. Now that’s a complicated way to figure out that Forever!

The Ugly Truth

You know, when you set out to try and figure out the opposite sex…the ugly truth is what you face.

The movie is a beautiful mix of reality and fiction. I loved it. I liked the humor which according to some is a bit too explicit. But then again let’s be mature and enjoy it.

The movie has a cool urban setting. A TV show producer finds herself struggling with the obnoxious and arrogant Gerard Butler. The movie revolves around how both of them tackle with their differences and how they ultimately fall in love –very common theme for a romantic comedy.

The high point of the movie is undoubtedly the humor. It’s fast and very witty. This is one movie which actually shows that men do run away from a situation. There is a woman standing in front of you and giving hints (not even subtle ones) and all he chooses to do is to run away from the situation.

Well, this piece is not a review of the movie. It’s about how I could relate so well to the movie.

Sometimes we just hold back emotions as we fear that they might not be caught well with the other person. Sometimes we just don’t want to speak out our heart and say things. The reasons are so many. Sometimes we just want destiny to work around and make things happen for us. Sometimes we leave everything to that destiny. But my point is…till how long do we leave it. Till how long do we not act?

I wish at the end of two hours like in a movie…I could have my answers. L

Just like that....!!!

I often get into that mood…

I often justify things basis that mood.

Still trying to figure out if others around me feel that way. How I wish I could give that as an excuse in my professional life as well.

It’s been exceptionally sunny here for the past few days and I realized that only when the sun shines brightly in my eyes through my window to wake me up. I do feel irritated. How I always wish the weather was smoky. Love it that way.

One of the reasons I guess I miss winters in Delhi the most. I still remember catching the school bus at 7 am. It used to be pitch dark, street lights still kept switched on for people like us to find a way. The fog was so thick that we would never know if the bus is on its way or did we miss it again.

Winters in Delhi were often referred as “kara ke ki thand” which is what exactly it was. It’s been a while since I saw myself in the mirror and saw my nose red from the cold, or when my mom would warm the water to even wash our faces. The cold was really bad. But I loved to snuggle up in my thick quilt. I remember my dad would snuggle up with me and my sister and try to push us out of the bed in order to wake us up for school.

Oh wow, just felt so good to only think about that winter.

Yes, while reality has attacked my senses now, I will have to move out in the sunny sultry Mumbai weather.

Only a memory now of that winter stays within me…. Nothing can melt it!

Simon and Garfunkel

Well not a cult band of any time. I love them and while am at writing about random thoughts, they seem to be constantly crossing my mind today. Those who have not heard of them… please do so. Maybe not very popular with the generation today, but any music lover of our parent’s time would recall at least one song.

I was introduced to them like many other songs and singers through my parents. Yes they are the sole reason why I like music. As a 2 month old I would sleep to old English music!

Coming back to the band, well it’s a two man show – Paul and Art. What I like about the songs are not the usual deep voice that is so bloody attractive, but the lyrics which a layered and sometimes so on-your-face that it comes as a blow.

My favorite songs:

April come she will

Bridge over troubled water

Homeward bound

I am a rock

Rosemary and thyme

El condor pasa

The dangling conversation …..

The list does not end at all…just that these are a few that I recall off hand….

They have a website now: http://www.simonandgarfunkel.com/

Visit it sometime and check it out! Its always good to discover some good music and it gives me a high to introduce you my friend to some amazing music! J